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Tuesday 22 September 2015

Options Clinic

The next appointment for me and the final at my hospital until I return to have the baby was to attend an options clinic to discuss my previous delivery.

Having briefly discussed my son's birth at my 20 weeks appointment with the Doctor this was for us to go into more detail about how my delivery went last time. I was trying not to be emotional and start blubbering as listening to what happened was quite hard to take in as there were many things that I had forgotten. 

Seeing my old file made it feel so much more real again that this baby was going to have to come out!
I had been in two minds and ever since I had got pregnant I had spent every night thinking about what option I wanted to take, did I want to try for a VBAC and have a natural delivery? Well yes actually, I wanted to plan to have that lovely, idyllic birth that I planned first time around, less intervention, labouring in a water pool and ideally birth in a pool and get into hypnobirthing to help me handle the pain, I suppose I was a bit disillusioned that I was going to have the exact same options that were available to me first time around.

As we attended the appointment we briefly discussed my son's previous birth and how I had got into labour but then it just stopped despite being induced. I went in with an open mind that if I could have the above then a natural delivery would be my choice.
Since having my son I had worked really hard to get a healthy bmi and wanted to be in the best physical condition that I could to have our second child and hopefully have a better delivery.
It soon became clear that although I could have a natural delivery, due to the previous section I would have to be monitored, this meant that my dream of a water birth was not to be. 
Now I faced a real dilemma as although having another section didn't bother me at all, I was concerned that it would be more difficult 2nd time around with a 5 year old to get to and from school.

I know that we cannot predict what can happen and there would be no way of ever knowing if I would have the same issues with this pregnancy but with having a child at home to think of I made the decision to book in and have an elective section.

The relief of coming to the decision was immense and as the date was confirmed for the delivery I just burst into tears, both my husband and the midwife were suprised and asked why I was upset, I know things can still change and if I was to go into labour naturally before the date of the section I could very well have a natural delivery but for me it was much more than this, this is my last baby and with that the last chance of me choosing a natural delivery and I have declined it.
Please don't get me wrong I made the decision based on my own circumstances and wishes I was not influenced but it just felt so final. 

So with the date in the diary, our baby girl has her birthdate - very exciting!!


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