Tuesday, 14 March 2017

Is anything perfect?

Of course it isn't!

I often dreamed how perfect it would be to attend parenting groups with my babies and toddlers and meet groups of mums and our children would all get on and build life long friendships, I would not have to return to work and would enjoy caring for my children and husband. Ok it may sound a little outdated but to be honest that is how I felt even when I was in school doing my studies.

Now at 35 years of age, I do still work but only 15 hours but after normally starting my day from 6.30am and having as little as 2 hours to cram in housework, shopping or other such tedious tasks getting ready to go to work for 5pm is the last thing I want to do. It is far removed from the perfect family life I expected to have.
Outdated, that is what it is. Longer hours have to be worked and everyone has much higher expectations for everything!

The truth is since Z came along, I have struggled with the huge changes that have taken place in my life, my freedom has gone again, I don't mind this as she is a huge pleasure to be around but I do miss being able to have a conversation uninterrupted with my husband or other adult!

Reading the Maternity Leaver book has really made me think about how I want things to continue or progress, I do want to work but I want to enjoy doing work. When I worked in travel I loved it, but now my love has developed for writing more and having some experience in Social Media now I realise that this is a channel I want to move into, I miss it. So as I get back into blogging I have decided to continue with the plans to gain more experience in social media.

Will I succeed who knows, all I know is at the moment the work life balance is not working and something has to give. If anyone has the answer let me know!
Monday, 13 March 2017

Getting your whites white and your stains gone?

Being at home most of the time, I always feel like I am chasing my tail and when it comes to housework more so.

As a member of the supersavvy me team, I recently received a Daz pack to try out for myself and to see what others thought of it.
With a toddler that feeds herself mostly and a 6 year old that is often too busy watching tv to see what he is eating, we see stains a plenty in our home so with the promise that Daz will keep whites brighter and colours dazzling, I was keen to try this with school uniforms, work shirts and bright baby clothes to maintain and my standard non bio didn't seem to liven up my white wash.

Over the weeks I used Daz on a range of clothes, seeing great results on the white towels that went in the wash when they came out noticeably brighter than they were using my normal non bio.
When it came to stain removal however, it didn't seem to perform as well, as you can see below.

Although it did remove the majority of food stains the larger stain to the right was still visible after a daily wash cycle on 40.

The whites however did still appear to be brighter. The smell when the clothes are washed is fresh and not too over powering but it did fade and when it came to folding the washing and coming to iron, the scent had disappeared and it would be nice if it lasted a little longer.

So unfortunately for me Daz is not viable for an everyday wash in our household, I am sure that the brand will be used again at some point in our home as there was a noticeable difference on the whites and on my husbands shirts but at this moment in time I do not wish to have to use two separate detergents for cleaning clothes.
Saturday, 4 March 2017

When just being a 6 year old goes too far......

When I initially set up this blog, it was to really diary how I found going from a mum of one to a mum of two and well, it didn't go very well as I didn't manage to get the posts done...ooops!

Now here I am coming up to midnight once more and I am typing away when I should be getting some sleep.

The reason for tonight's post however, is because this week has been pretty turbulent for my eldest child who is 6. Yes, I may be a mum to 2 but I am still a first time mum when it comes to the 6 year old in that I am still learning - follow me?
This week (his first back after the half term holidays) I noticed a change in his behaviour, I will come back and explain this later but for now stay with me......

You see, before half term, I was concerned about my son's behaviour, it was erratic and unpredictable to a point and I couldn't see what was causing it, until it started to become clear, he was getting bullied. Ok talk to some adults and it's kids being kids, read your school's policy and well it's bullying plain and simple. This week it got to a head. I've mentioned the hair pulling, the pushing and well all the other things we brush aside as a 'learning curve' for a child but now when your child comes home crying and says that a group of children of the same age crowded him and wouldn't get off him, it feels somewhat personal.
I take on the pain that my child feels and want to find the child/children that have caused mine pain and upset and ask them how they would feel. But I can't.
So I speak to the teacher....again. They promise to find out what has happened. It's dismissed and off we go.

Except I am not dismissing it anymore. It's no longer fun to torment a child so they feel they have to physically push away and then be disciplined for it. I understand how difficult it is for teachers to deal  with all the things they do (my mum taught for over 45 years and I have many family members who are still in Education) however I believe that at this age they are very impressionable and it is very easy to get fed up with 'tell tales' or constant offenders of bad behaviour but what do we do as a parent?

Over numerous weeks my son has put up with hair pulling, his head being slammed, being 'got on' by a number of children, a group of children approaching him and crowding him, other children chanting another to 'get him' as well as events that happened before last term which included being pushed and his clothes being taken and thrown in the mud.

Being told he can't play with friends seems to be the main bone of contention at the moment, for this school year he was separate from many of his close friends and when it's play time he is often told he can't join in, my heart just breaks for him as I was bullied in primary school and the damage is causes is irreparable.

Sometimes you look back on these events and shrug them off, my son has started to by saying that the so called friends were nice to him today so things are all ok, so what if tomorrow they decided to not be nice is that ok too? Schools still shrug of this behaviour as kids being kids but digging around the internet to see if I am just being an over cautious mum and I am getting more and more facts that this is definitely not behaviour that should be accepted.

I suppose I am just rambling but when your child comes home complaining of their hair being pulled or being pushed over would you just be happy to ignore it and tell them to ignore the children or would you tell them to fight back? As an adult is it acceptable to us if another adult was to behave in the manner in which some children do? I don't think it is.

This week in school I hope it is the beginning of the end, I am addressing the issues and how it affects our child and his behaviour, how he has changed from a bright, happy boy into an angry, frustrated child.

Wish me luck, I am off to vent my frustrations with the school next week and hopefully get the issues resolved.

Thursday, 2 March 2017

Moving up

So it's time to get a new car seat, our group 0 seat is now outgrown and much to my dislike my daughter is forward facing in my car.

We must get one for my husband's car and here lies the problem.  He has an audi a5 sportback and well it seems not all car seats are compatible thanks to the sloping rear seats.
I've had a look online and can see the Britax Max Fit and Britax Dualfix are compatible but hubby won't pay the price.

I can kind of understand where he is coming from as we didn't have erf (extended rear facing) with my son but I can't explain it, I just want her rear facing for longer. Z is pretty petite and when she falls asleep there's little to no support for her head in a forward facing.

The debate is continuing and I'm still trying to find alternatives so if anyone has the same car and can help recommend let me know!